Words cannot describe how excruciatingly boring I thought the Catholic Mass was before May 16, xxxx. In fact, I cannot even entirely explain how pass I thought Catholicism was in general.

  I grew up in a non-practicing Catholic household. I "believed" in God, but that didn't really mean anything to me. We went to Mass a little bit here and there, but neither me nor my parents really liked it. The only reason we went was because my Sunday School teacher said everyone should go. Speaking of Sunday School, my attendance was awful, and that was okay with my parents. So why were we affiliated with a Catholic parish at all? I still don't entirely know; all I can say is that Catholicism was what my parents considered to be our CULTURE. It was part of who we were, yet it really wasn't.

  May 16 was the day of my Confirmation, a sacrament in the Catholic Church that fully initiates teenagers into the faith. I was 16 years old. Catholics believe that the Holy Spirit fills the recipients of this sacrament. I can sincerely say that my life would never be the same after that day.

  A week before May 16, I clearly remember reflecting on my imminent Confirmation. I was excited that this marked the end of all my religion classes. As a serious student (who basically revered academics more than God), I was happy to no longer have my time wasted by religion. I was happy to never be pressured to go to Mass again. I had rarely gone to Mass since the age of 11, and then a couple weeks before May 16, I was guilted into going, just once. I thought it was the most boring thing EVER. I didn't know why anyone would waste his/her time with the Mass.

  As I reflected on the coming end of my religious "education" in Catholicism (which really wasn't education at all due to all my absences, poor catechists, and lukewarm Catholic parents), I pondered becoming a Baptist as an adult. I knew some cool Baptists. But for the time being, I just wanted to focus on school.

  I came into my Confirmation with a closed mind. But I did believe in God and had a meager, but existent, prayer life. What happened next was amazing. I can't point to some particular moment during the Sacrament where the Heavens opened and Jesus spoke to me. Because that didn't happen.

  What I can say is that I came out of that church a completely changed person by the grace of God. All of the sudden, I WANTED to go to Mass. I left the church with a firm resolve to go to Mass every week--and that resolve has never wavered since. I very quickly found a love for the Mass (probably because of the Eucharist). I found a love for Catholicism, and I became a practicing Catholic for the first time in my life. Christ became the most important part of my life, and I thought about Him everyday, all the time. When someone insulted my faith, adrenaline bubbled inside of me, which had never happened to me before. I loved God even more than I loved school, finally. I realized that I need to depend on God. I started learning more about Catholicism, and found how little I actually knew.

  My heart had already fallen in love with Catholicism with the help of the Holy Spirit, but my mind hadn't caught up to speed yet. There were things I needed to work through, such as the Real Presence of the Eucharist and the immorality of abortion. Eventually I understood these teachings and recognized their truth. Faith is a constant journey, and there are still things I look into. I have always found that the Catholic Church's stances resonate with my own reasoning and human intuition.

  I am so thankful that God had mercy on me. He could have just let me be; He didn't have to rock my world on May 16, xxxx. I would have gone on without the fullness and meaning that my belief in Christ gives me. I would have gone on blind to my own sins. I would have never felt the joy that Christ brings me. I would never have gone to Mass again, I would never have gone to Eucharistic Adoration, I would have never prayed the Rosary, I would have never read the Bible, and I would have never learned about all that I was missing out on. I would have lived, but it would have been an empty life.

  Faith doesn't mean that you blindly accept things. After the initial promptings of the Holy Spirit, I researched extensively. I even researched other religions, just to make sure. Faith doesn't mean that the person you are at your core changes. Instead you become all you were meant to be. Faith doesn't mean you will become a boring person. Instead, you will be more dynamic than ever before. Faith doesn't mean restrictions. It means a true and deep freedom.

  Faith = Joy

  <3

  Peace and God Bless you!

  Catholic4Ever